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Putting socks on a baby is like trying to swat a fly. You might start with confidence - I'm a big person and that's an itty bitty fly. I can swat that fly. But the fly moves fast and darts in all directions. You're always one step behind the fly, following behind it like a ninny, darting this way and that. So you stop, collect yourself, try a different approach. You attempt to anticipate the fly's next move. But you fail. You might have even received a whack on the wrist by a flailing baby heel, which stuns you at first and then impresses you with how much it actually hurt. Hey, maybe this kid is a soccer player. Anyway. The only successful way to catch a fly is to trap it. Cover it with a glass, slide a piece of paper under it, and carry it outside to it's safety and your sanity. This is where the fly analogy breaks down. You can't very well trap a baby foot under a glass and let it fly free outside. If you did that the baby foot still wouldn't have a sock on it AND you'd be down one baby foot. If working with only one set of hands, my latest and most successful technique is to gather the sock between the index fingers and thumbs. Using the middle fingers, ring fingers, and pinkies, grab onto the knee and shimmy your way down to the foot and swoop that sock on.

Then reminisce about your college education and how it's being put to good use.